A recent copying error (of an email address) got me to wondering about the difficulty of teaching an old dog new tricks. It was only in the last year that I finally got rid of my keypunch machine, so I'm not what you would necessarily call the most forward thinking technologist. :-)
I also fondly remember how my colleagues and I used to deride editors such as vi and emacs as "Fool Screen Editors". We believed that if you made it easy for fools to use computers they would do foolish things with them. Come to think of it, we were dead-on in that prediction (though few people today would call those editors "easy").
And don't even get me started on WYSIWYG word processors! If you couldn't hack TeX or troff you had no business writing anything in the first place!
Gotta go feed my mouse.
Monday, March 28, 2005
Wednesday, March 23, 2005
Divine Intervention
A recent reference by Gene Bob about Divine Intervention (in this case a lightning strike on the transmission tower broadcasting Air America) caused me to recall a Divine extortion scheme involving Oral Roberts.
In 1987 Oral Roberts informed his flock that God had appeared to him and demanded that he raise US$8 million by March of that year or God would "call him home". There was immediately a campaign mounted under the banner "LORD", which stood for Let Oral Roberts Die. The goal was to convince people to NOT contribute to Oral Roberts' fund raising effort!
The "LORD" button was quite popular on the UT campus. Sadly, I didn't save one of the buttons. And, of course, Oral is still with us.
In 1987 Oral Roberts informed his flock that God had appeared to him and demanded that he raise US$8 million by March of that year or God would "call him home". There was immediately a campaign mounted under the banner "LORD", which stood for Let Oral Roberts Die. The goal was to convince people to NOT contribute to Oral Roberts' fund raising effort!
The "LORD" button was quite popular on the UT campus. Sadly, I didn't save one of the buttons. And, of course, Oral is still with us.
Sunday, March 20, 2005
I don't wanna grow up / When I was your age
As Gene Bob reported recently, I just celebrated a birthday. One of the benefits of having kids (and sometimes there don't seem to be many) is that birthdays have to have gifts and cake. So I asked for a Lego X-Wing Fighter. And I always get what I want!
But it makes one think... I can remember a time when I was thrilled that my parents had given me an empty box from the Dixie™ paper cups. It had a clear plastic window in it! Pure Joy! I didn't have a cool space toy, but I had a box with a plastic window in it!
All together now... And I was grateful!
Unfortunately, my younger brother was as upset about me getting the Dixie cup box as I was happy to have it. So he pushed me down the stairs to the basement.
But it makes one think... I can remember a time when I was thrilled that my parents had given me an empty box from the Dixie™ paper cups. It had a clear plastic window in it! Pure Joy! I didn't have a cool space toy, but I had a box with a plastic window in it!
All together now... And I was grateful!
Unfortunately, my younger brother was as upset about me getting the Dixie cup box as I was happy to have it. So he pushed me down the stairs to the basement.
Wednesday, March 16, 2005
Dandelion Crop
I pay my kids 10¢ for each dandelion they bring me from my yard — as long as it hasn't gone to seed yet. If it's gone to seed they get fined (15¢). Of course they've figured out that it's best to quietly destroy the ones that have gone to seed so that I don't find them.
Thankfully, they don't yet appear to be cultivating dandelions, though I'm sure they'll figure out the financial benefit of that someday. :-)
Thankfully, they don't yet appear to be cultivating dandelions, though I'm sure they'll figure out the financial benefit of that someday. :-)
Incredible!
The Incredibles was released on DVD yesterday and my (much) better half found it for sale at Target for only $15.99. It was even coupled with a coupon for a 4-pack of flavored fizzy water.
We're the sort of parents who prescreen movies before letting our kids watch them and usually try to have the first kid viewing during daylight hours. Maybe that's overprotective, but pundits are getting increasingly concerned, as am I, about the accelerated aging of our children. I'd prefer to allow my kids to be innocent for a bit longer, though it's hard to do unless you home school (which I personally think is a mistake).
Anyway, I watched The Incredibles last night and loved it! Two big toes up!
There is no profanity, no nudity, only the faintest hint of sexuality. The violence is bloodless, all body parts remain attached, and no internal organs are exposed or removed. If your kids can handle Popeye™ or Tom & Jerry™ or other classic cartoons then they can probably handle The Incredibles.
We plan on having a pizza-and-movie picnic in the living room this weekend. I'm sure it'll be incredible. :-)
We're the sort of parents who prescreen movies before letting our kids watch them and usually try to have the first kid viewing during daylight hours. Maybe that's overprotective, but pundits are getting increasingly concerned, as am I, about the accelerated aging of our children. I'd prefer to allow my kids to be innocent for a bit longer, though it's hard to do unless you home school (which I personally think is a mistake).
Anyway, I watched The Incredibles last night and loved it! Two big toes up!
There is no profanity, no nudity, only the faintest hint of sexuality. The violence is bloodless, all body parts remain attached, and no internal organs are exposed or removed. If your kids can handle Popeye™ or Tom & Jerry™ or other classic cartoons then they can probably handle The Incredibles.
We plan on having a pizza-and-movie picnic in the living room this weekend. I'm sure it'll be incredible. :-)
Tuesday, March 15, 2005
10 MPG
I saw a pick'em-up truck today with 10 MPG on its vanity license plate. Some vanity plates are a challenge to figure out (like "FXUN8" :-), but this wasn't one of them. It was on a jacked up Ford F-250 Super Duty with oversized tires, 4-wheel drive, and a V10 engine. So I think it's safe to assume that his plate refers to his gas mileage.
Which leaves me to wonder, is he bragging? If so, what does his other vehicle's vanity tag say? 80 IQ? HSDROPOUT? 4 INCHES?
Which leaves me to wonder, is he bragging? If so, what does his other vehicle's vanity tag say? 80 IQ? HSDROPOUT? 4 INCHES?
Monday, March 07, 2005
From the Big House to the Trailer Park
By now we've all had time to adjust to the fact that Martha is out of prison. She will be spending the next 5 months under Estate Arrest at her "winter" home (on 150+ acres) in New York.
Talking Heads are chattering endlessly about the resurgence of the Martha Stewart brand since she entered prison. Of course they talked about how her demeanor prior to prison hurt her image, but they've talked more about her "transformation" in prison. She is even rumored to be concerned about (women's) prisoner's rights. Then it hit me! It's BRILLIANT!
Where can you buy Martha Stewart™ branded products? K-Mart. Who shops at K-Mart? The kind of people who would be pleased to know that Martha is concerned about the treatment of prisoners!
Martha was always an inspiration to the little people. Martha's "style" wasn't about purchasing expensive things, but about making them. From scratch. Rich people, if they watched her shows at all, used it for ideas to give to decorators and caterers. The rest of us thought, "I can do that." Of course it was a farce, because even Martha couldn't do that without the effort and expertise of an army of assistants, but that was hidden from us. We would look at Martha and all her riches and finery and pretend that she made it all from the same kinds of scraps that we throw away every day.
And while we may have been upset with the idea that Martha had gone all uppity on us with her insider trading and all, her stint in prison reaffirmed her connection to the little people. And now she's going to be helping us fight for better treatment for Bubba and Betty-Jo when they find themselves in the lock-up because of the basic injustice of the world run by the haves (who look just like Martha).
Talking Heads are chattering endlessly about the resurgence of the Martha Stewart brand since she entered prison. Of course they talked about how her demeanor prior to prison hurt her image, but they've talked more about her "transformation" in prison. She is even rumored to be concerned about (women's) prisoner's rights. Then it hit me! It's BRILLIANT!
Where can you buy Martha Stewart™ branded products? K-Mart. Who shops at K-Mart? The kind of people who would be pleased to know that Martha is concerned about the treatment of prisoners!
Martha was always an inspiration to the little people. Martha's "style" wasn't about purchasing expensive things, but about making them. From scratch. Rich people, if they watched her shows at all, used it for ideas to give to decorators and caterers. The rest of us thought, "I can do that." Of course it was a farce, because even Martha couldn't do that without the effort and expertise of an army of assistants, but that was hidden from us. We would look at Martha and all her riches and finery and pretend that she made it all from the same kinds of scraps that we throw away every day.
And while we may have been upset with the idea that Martha had gone all uppity on us with her insider trading and all, her stint in prison reaffirmed her connection to the little people. And now she's going to be helping us fight for better treatment for Bubba and Betty-Jo when they find themselves in the lock-up because of the basic injustice of the world run by the haves (who look just like Martha).
Wednesday, March 02, 2005
Too Clever For Their Own Good
As mentioned in the previous post, I am the owner of a brand-new Compaq Presario SR1300NX computer. Due to factors beyond our control we have the need for floppy disk drive in this computer. A quick glance inside the floor model revealed that it does have both a floppy connector on the motherboard and the proper power connector on the power supply. So I opted to have what I assumed would be the cleaner option and purchased an internal floppy drive and cable.
Sadly, Compaq doesn't believe in internal floppy drives.
There is a removeable panel in the front cover between the removeable media slots (e.g. compact flash) and the front audio/USB/Firewire ports. Taking this off reveals an unused 3.5" drive bay which would be perfect for a floppy drive save for three things: first, the opening in the case faceplate is 6" wide; second, the drive bay is left justified in that space; and third, the mounting system doesn't let me mount the drive in the proper position front-to-back (it either sticks out half an inch or is recessed half an inch.
So scratch that option. There are some full size bays near the top for things like CD drives. You can buy an enclosure to hold a floppy in an attractive fashion in such a space. Unfortunately, Compaq strikes again. Apparently it just isn't sexy enough to have the front of a CD drive visible in the front, so they have a little trap door in front of two positions where they want you to install your CD/DVD drives. These trap doors are opened from the inside by the force of the disk tray opening. They even have a little button on the door which you must hope will line up properly with the eject button on your drive, if you wish to use an aftermarket drive in this beast.
I'm going to see if I can remove one of the trap doors without doing too much injury to the case. I'm hoping to use one of those floppy enclosures, though the possibility still exists that Compaq's sexy mounting system won't let me install that at the proper depth either. Oh, well. There is still the option of an external USB floppy drive.
Sadly, Compaq doesn't believe in internal floppy drives.
There is a removeable panel in the front cover between the removeable media slots (e.g. compact flash) and the front audio/USB/Firewire ports. Taking this off reveals an unused 3.5" drive bay which would be perfect for a floppy drive save for three things: first, the opening in the case faceplate is 6" wide; second, the drive bay is left justified in that space; and third, the mounting system doesn't let me mount the drive in the proper position front-to-back (it either sticks out half an inch or is recessed half an inch.
So scratch that option. There are some full size bays near the top for things like CD drives. You can buy an enclosure to hold a floppy in an attractive fashion in such a space. Unfortunately, Compaq strikes again. Apparently it just isn't sexy enough to have the front of a CD drive visible in the front, so they have a little trap door in front of two positions where they want you to install your CD/DVD drives. These trap doors are opened from the inside by the force of the disk tray opening. They even have a little button on the door which you must hope will line up properly with the eject button on your drive, if you wish to use an aftermarket drive in this beast.
I'm going to see if I can remove one of the trap doors without doing too much injury to the case. I'm hoping to use one of those floppy enclosures, though the possibility still exists that Compaq's sexy mounting system won't let me install that at the proper depth either. Oh, well. There is still the option of an external USB floppy drive.
Don't Give Me Any Ideas!
My wife decided that she just couldn't face running TurboTax this year on her old PC (266MHz Pentium 2). Gotta get a new one. Wouldn't let me build it myself (too expensive :-). So after gathering requirements and doing a bit of research on the web we ended up at the local Fry's where we picked a Compaq Presario SR1300NX ($429 with $50 mail-in rebate).
It needed more memory and a floppy, so I jotted down some info so the sales droid could write up the ticket while I went to pick up the floppy and a cable. Products in hand, I swung back 'round the information/assistance kiosk, picked up my order form and headed to checkout.
SCREEEEEECH! (sound of coming to an abrupt and lengthy halt)
The floppy I had chosen had a sticker saying it was $9.99 but the computer said it should have been $12.99. Any customer service rep worth their salt would have immediately given me the lower price (Fry's price stickers identify the product, so there was no chance that I had switched the prices) and made a note for someone to check other products on the shelf to make sure that all were properly priced. But I was at Fry's. The register monkey had to GO LOOK AT THE PRODUCTS ON THE SHELF before it could do anything OBVIOUS! :-(
While I'm waiting, still (barely) patiently, I lean up against the counter and hear a muffled POP along with a sensation of something ever so slightly giving way to my hip. "Hmmm," I think, "What was that?" I reach into my jacket pocket and find that a ketchup packet (from Whataburger) has burst. Ugh. I pull out a hand full of red, sticky, "fancy" ketchup. It looks not entirely unlike blood. Would probably look even more not entirely unlike blood were it to ooze between my fingers as they were squeezing harder and harder around the neck of the closest Fry's employee.
After cleaning up my hands I glanced at the memory module that the reg-monk had fetched from "the cage" prior to swinging off in search of the floppy aisle. It (the memory) wasn't what I needed. Since my monkey was off researching errant floppy pricing I tried to get the attention of someone else to check on the issue with my memory module. Nice idea, wrong store. My monkey returned at the same time that I succeeded in getting the attention of a manager. He must've been waiting for the Clearasil™ to dry before he talked to a customer.
By the time I had the right memory and the $9.99 price for the floppy the ketchup in my pocket was dry. I had spent AT LEAST 30 minutes at the register. No wonder I purchase most of my computer stuff over the internet — I get it faster and with less hassle!
It needed more memory and a floppy, so I jotted down some info so the sales droid could write up the ticket while I went to pick up the floppy and a cable. Products in hand, I swung back 'round the information/assistance kiosk, picked up my order form and headed to checkout.
SCREEEEEECH! (sound of coming to an abrupt and lengthy halt)
The floppy I had chosen had a sticker saying it was $9.99 but the computer said it should have been $12.99. Any customer service rep worth their salt would have immediately given me the lower price (Fry's price stickers identify the product, so there was no chance that I had switched the prices) and made a note for someone to check other products on the shelf to make sure that all were properly priced. But I was at Fry's. The register monkey had to GO LOOK AT THE PRODUCTS ON THE SHELF before it could do anything OBVIOUS! :-(
While I'm waiting, still (barely) patiently, I lean up against the counter and hear a muffled POP along with a sensation of something ever so slightly giving way to my hip. "Hmmm," I think, "What was that?" I reach into my jacket pocket and find that a ketchup packet (from Whataburger) has burst. Ugh. I pull out a hand full of red, sticky, "fancy" ketchup. It looks not entirely unlike blood. Would probably look even more not entirely unlike blood were it to ooze between my fingers as they were squeezing harder and harder around the neck of the closest Fry's employee.
After cleaning up my hands I glanced at the memory module that the reg-monk had fetched from "the cage" prior to swinging off in search of the floppy aisle. It (the memory) wasn't what I needed. Since my monkey was off researching errant floppy pricing I tried to get the attention of someone else to check on the issue with my memory module. Nice idea, wrong store. My monkey returned at the same time that I succeeded in getting the attention of a manager. He must've been waiting for the Clearasil™ to dry before he talked to a customer.
By the time I had the right memory and the $9.99 price for the floppy the ketchup in my pocket was dry. I had spent AT LEAST 30 minutes at the register. No wonder I purchase most of my computer stuff over the internet — I get it faster and with less hassle!
Friday, February 25, 2005
Diversity?
A front page article in today's Plano newspaper reports on a public art project to recognize the history of Plano's Douglass Community. The Douglass Community is an historically black neighborhood named after Frederick Douglass, a slave and abolitionist.
So what's wrong with this? Well, nothing, I guess. But two things strike me as a tad bit... odd. First, the project is a mosaic to be placed along the train tracks where, I presume, it will only be visible to people riding the DART train. That doesn't seem very public to me, and also hints at the "wrong side of the tracks" stereotype.
Secondly, the two artists featured in the story (I don't know if there are others or not) are white. The photo accompanying the story doesn't show much of the art (which is not yet complete or even partially installed), but I can't help but worry about the style and theme(s). Will they reflect the community and its history (and future)? Or will it be a typical white bread interpretation? The article makes no mention of the opinions, good or bad, of anyone living in the Douglass Community today.
Or am I being a racist by suggesting that only black artists should have been chosen to produce art recognizing a black community?
So what's wrong with this? Well, nothing, I guess. But two things strike me as a tad bit... odd. First, the project is a mosaic to be placed along the train tracks where, I presume, it will only be visible to people riding the DART train. That doesn't seem very public to me, and also hints at the "wrong side of the tracks" stereotype.
Secondly, the two artists featured in the story (I don't know if there are others or not) are white. The photo accompanying the story doesn't show much of the art (which is not yet complete or even partially installed), but I can't help but worry about the style and theme(s). Will they reflect the community and its history (and future)? Or will it be a typical white bread interpretation? The article makes no mention of the opinions, good or bad, of anyone living in the Douglass Community today.
Or am I being a racist by suggesting that only black artists should have been chosen to produce art recognizing a black community?
Monday, February 21, 2005
The Big Two-Oh!
My truck's oh-dough-meter just turned over the big two-oh. Yep, twenty thousand miles! In only 1725 days! That's 1,298.5 furlongs per fortnight, which seems rather high given that I work at home and walk my kid to school most days.
Must be those runs to Home Depot, Whataburger, and bowling.
At this rate, my son, who can be seen in the pictures of my truck and who just turned 8 today, will start driving this truck before it hits 55. 55,000 miles, not 55 mph. It's slow, but not that slow. :-)
Must be those runs to Home Depot, Whataburger, and bowling.
At this rate, my son, who can be seen in the pictures of my truck and who just turned 8 today, will start driving this truck before it hits 55. 55,000 miles, not 55 mph. It's slow, but not that slow. :-)
Friday, February 18, 2005
R.I.P. Dick-Bob
Pro bowling pioneer Dick Weber died in his sleep on Feb. 13, 2005. He had just returned from the ABC (bowling) championships in Baton Rouge. He was 75.
Weber began making a living from bowling in 1955 when he toured with a Budweiser sponsored team. Three years later he helped found the PBA. Many will remember Dick as a fixture on Saturday-afternoon bowling broadcasts in the 60's and 70's.
While some think that Bob-ness comes from living in Texas, I believe that it is more a state of mind. And if making your living from bowling isn't synonymous with Bob-ness, well, then I just don't know what is. So here's to ya, Dick-Bob. The weather guessers around here are predicting more thunderstorms than usual this spring, they just didn't realize that it was because God has a new bowling partner.
Weber began making a living from bowling in 1955 when he toured with a Budweiser sponsored team. Three years later he helped found the PBA. Many will remember Dick as a fixture on Saturday-afternoon bowling broadcasts in the 60's and 70's.
While some think that Bob-ness comes from living in Texas, I believe that it is more a state of mind. And if making your living from bowling isn't synonymous with Bob-ness, well, then I just don't know what is. So here's to ya, Dick-Bob. The weather guessers around here are predicting more thunderstorms than usual this spring, they just didn't realize that it was because God has a new bowling partner.
Thursday, February 10, 2005
Pope John Paul II, Part II
A couple of weeks ago I wondered if God was well pleased with Pope Johnny P Numero Dos swatting away His symbols of peace, love, and the Holy Spirit. Wasn't he rushed to the hospital the very next day?
For extra credit, what is Paul quoting in this passage from his letter to the Romans?Beloved, never avenge yourselves,
but leave room for the wrath of God;
for it is written, "Vengeance is mine,
I will repay, says the Lord."
-- Romans 12:19
My Lent Filter Is Clogged
Jesus H. Christ! Is it Lent already?
Went to church on Ash Wednesday to get my ashes and couldn't help but notice the diversity among the parishoners here in Plano. Our fair town has a very homogeneous image, but I saw people with all kinds of different hair colors. That's a start, isn't it?
Anyway, it isn't just that Lent seems early this year, it actually is early this year. Last year Ash Wednesday was on February 26th. You see, Ash Wednesday is 46 days before Easter, and Easter is the first Sunday after the first full moon that occurs on or after the vernal equinox. Except that we aren't really talking about the astronomical vernal equinox or the astronomical full moon, but the ecclesiastical ones. There is a table maintained by the Church that defines the ecclesiastical full moons, and the ecclesiastical vernal equinox is always on March 21.
No, these aren't the same tables used by Astrologers.
What? You don't have access to the church lunar tables? Well, you're in luck. Some geek named Oudin had way too much time on his hands back in 1940 and came up with the following set of equations to compute the month and day of Easter using only the year, y, as input.
Let's work through a bit. This is 2005, so y = 2005. We immediately compute c to be 20.05, but since we're doing integer division we throw away the .05 and are left with c = 20. Still with me? Good. Plugging 2005 into the equation for n gives us
If you are determined you can finish the calculations (be careful with your precedence rules) and figure out that Easter will fall on March 27th this year. At least for the Roman Catholic Church and the Protestants. Yes, the Protestant churches, even the Suthren Babatists, follow the Pope's rules on this one.
No, they don't give you beads if you go to church on Mardi Gras.
Went to church on Ash Wednesday to get my ashes and couldn't help but notice the diversity among the parishoners here in Plano. Our fair town has a very homogeneous image, but I saw people with all kinds of different hair colors. That's a start, isn't it?
Anyway, it isn't just that Lent seems early this year, it actually is early this year. Last year Ash Wednesday was on February 26th. You see, Ash Wednesday is 46 days before Easter, and Easter is the first Sunday after the first full moon that occurs on or after the vernal equinox. Except that we aren't really talking about the astronomical vernal equinox or the astronomical full moon, but the ecclesiastical ones. There is a table maintained by the Church that defines the ecclesiastical full moons, and the ecclesiastical vernal equinox is always on March 21.
No, these aren't the same tables used by Astrologers.
What? You don't have access to the church lunar tables? Well, you're in luck. Some geek named Oudin had way too much time on his hands back in 1940 and came up with the following set of equations to compute the month and day of Easter using only the year, y, as input.
Gene, put down your hand. Yes, Gene, I see the 19 times y divided by 19. No, that isn't the same as y. Why? Because these are all integer operations. That means that you throw away any fractional parts.c = y / 100
n = y - 19 * ( y / 19 )
k = ( c - 17 ) / 25
i = c - c / 4 - ( c - k ) / 3 + 19 * n + 15
i = i - 30 * ( i / 30 )
i = i - ( i / 28 ) * ( 1 - ( i / 28 ) * ( 29 / ( i + 1 ) )
* ( ( 21 - n ) / 11 ) )
j = y + y / 4 + i + 2 - c + c / 4
j = j - 7 * ( j / 7 )
l = i - j
m = 3 + ( l + 40 ) / 44
d = l + 28 - 31 * ( m / 4 )
Let's work through a bit. This is 2005, so y = 2005. We immediately compute c to be 20.05, but since we're doing integer division we throw away the .05 and are left with c = 20. Still with me? Good. Plugging 2005 into the equation for n gives us
After doing the integer division shown inside the parentheses we getn = 2005 - 19 * ( 2005 / 19 )
And that is clearly 10.n = 2005 - 19 * 105
If you are determined you can finish the calculations (be careful with your precedence rules) and figure out that Easter will fall on March 27th this year. At least for the Roman Catholic Church and the Protestants. Yes, the Protestant churches, even the Suthren Babatists, follow the Pope's rules on this one.
Shallow Thought #1: Do I have to read phishing emails on Fridays in Lent?Hope you've all recovered from the Mardi Gras celebrations. And speaking of Mardi Gras, you can figure it out from Easter as well. Once you know when Easter is you count backwards 47 days and you find yourself on Mardi Gras.
No, they don't give you beads if you go to church on Mardi Gras.
Monday, January 31, 2005
Shoo! Damned birds!
I fear that my blog is going to the birds. ;-)
Did'ja see the photos of Pope John Paul II swatting the doves away on Sunday, 30 January 2005?
When I saw that I couldn't help but think of Matthew 3:16-17.
What if those doves pestering JPII were the Holy Spirit? Since the news didn't report any voices from the heavens I have to wonder if He was "well pleased" with JP rejecting the Holy Spirit.
Aside: I'm probably going to hell for quoting the KJV.
Did'ja see the photos of Pope John Paul II swatting the doves away on Sunday, 30 January 2005?
When I saw that I couldn't help but think of Matthew 3:16-17.
And Jesus, when he was baptised, went up straightway out of the water: and, lo, the heavens were opened unto him, and he saw the spirit of God descending like a dove and lighting upon him.
And lo a voice from heaven, saying, This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased.
What if those doves pestering JPII were the Holy Spirit? Since the news didn't report any voices from the heavens I have to wonder if He was "well pleased" with JP rejecting the Holy Spirit.
Aside: I'm probably going to hell for quoting the KJV.
Thursday, January 27, 2005
Ooh, Baby!
I'm not sure what category this falls into. Is it "this week's sign that the apocalypse is upon us" (as Sports Illustrated might call it)? Or is it, "Beam me up, Scotty. There's no intelligent life down here"? Or perhaps it's, "Why didn't I think of that?"
It is the news report that Jenna Jamison, the porn star, is producing "ring moans" that you can install on your mobile (nubile?) phone.
The next question is, do you make this your default ring sound or do you only associate it with certain callers? The possibilities are endless.
And since our mind is already in the gutter, how long do you think it will be before some "adult" magazine takes the SI Sneaker Phone promo to the next level and offers a "penis phone"? Vibrate mode. Hands free. The perfect way to get her to answer your call.
Damn! Already been done.
It is the news report that Jenna Jamison, the porn star, is producing "ring moans" that you can install on your mobile (nubile?) phone.
Tangent: Sun Microsystems' toll free customer support number in the US is 1-800-USA-4-SUN. This is the number that holders of Bronze, Silver, Gold, or Platinum service contracts call when they need help. But if you accidentally mis-remember the number and call 1-800-USA-2-SUN you get (or used to get, I haven't check in a while) a phone sex service. I guess that's for the "Platinum Blonde" service contracts. :-)
The next question is, do you make this your default ring sound or do you only associate it with certain callers? The possibilities are endless.
And since our mind is already in the gutter, how long do you think it will be before some "adult" magazine takes the SI Sneaker Phone promo to the next level and offers a "penis phone"? Vibrate mode. Hands free. The perfect way to get her to answer your call.
Damn! Already been done.
Wednesday, January 26, 2005
A Murder of Grackles?
What do you call a group of Grackles?
According to a list I keep (I've had it for at least 15 years and have no idea where I got it) the naming of groups of birds is not consistent at all. You might think, "oh, a group of birds is a flock", but you'd be only partially correct. Haven't you heard of a gaggle of geese? How about a brood of hens? Those are pretty familiar to most folks. Here are some other groupings of birds:
But my all time favorite is a
I think that same term should apply to Grackles, don't you?
According to a list I keep (I've had it for at least 15 years and have no idea where I got it) the naming of groups of birds is not consistent at all. You might think, "oh, a group of birds is a flock", but you'd be only partially correct. Haven't you heard of a gaggle of geese? How about a brood of hens? Those are pretty familiar to most folks. Here are some other groupings of birds:
- Band of (Blue)Jays
- Brace of Ducks
- Cast of Falcons (or Hawks)
- Charm of Finches
- Colony of Gulls
- Company of Parrots
- Convocation of Eagles
- Covey of Quail (and Partridges, whether in a pear tree or not)
- Descent of Woodpeckers
- Dule of Doves
- Exaltation of Larks
- Flight of Pigeons (or Swallows)
- Flurry of Flamingos
- Host of Sparrows
- Mustering of Storks
- Ostentation of Peacocks
- Rafter of Turkeys
- Rookery of Penguins
- Stare of Owls
- Tiding of Magpies
- Unkindness of Ravens
- Wedge of Swans
But my all time favorite is a
- Murder of Crows
I think that same term should apply to Grackles, don't you?
I hate okra
I hate okra. And I'm glad I hate okra, because if I liked okra then I'd eat it all the time. And I hate okra.
Saturday, January 22, 2005
Epiphany
There was an epiphany at my house today: the Epiphany has passed and our Christmas decorations are still up. So we finally started taking them down.
Fortunately for our neighbors we are not the sort who competes in the yard decoration contest (it is a contest, isn't it?) so they haven't been embarrassed by visitors asking why the guy next door still has giant inflatable secular seasonal characters on the front lawn.
As soon as I'm done with the decorations I'll start with the Christmas cards. Sending them, that is. Does anyone know when public school starts again?
Fortunately for our neighbors we are not the sort who competes in the yard decoration contest (it is a contest, isn't it?) so they haven't been embarrassed by visitors asking why the guy next door still has giant inflatable secular seasonal characters on the front lawn.
As soon as I'm done with the decorations I'll start with the Christmas cards. Sending them, that is. Does anyone know when public school starts again?
Friday, January 21, 2005
Farm Aid?
Has Willie Nelson become a Republican? I have to wonder after hearing about his latest venture, BioWillie's Biodiesel.
Biodiesel is a very clean burning diesel alternative (i.e. it can be used in standard diesel engines) that is made from vegetable oil or animal fats. In the US, most biodiesel is made from soybean oil, and it is that connection which attracted the Farm Aid organizer.
Today, biodiesel is still a niche fuel product, selling only about 30 million gallons in 2004 (according to the National Biodiesel Board). Indeed, it is possible to make your own biodiesel at home, in whatever quantities you wish. All you need is clean vegetable oil, lye, and alcohol, all of which can be made at home if you are so inclined.
Last year, the American Jobs Creation Act of 2004 created a tax incentive for biodiesel producers. Cities and States with pollution problems are also looking at biodiesel because of its cleanliness compared to "dino-diesel". So I wouldn't be at all surprised if states started requiring the use of biodiesel as a way to meet clean air requirements.
When (if?) that happens, who do YOU think will be producing biodiesel? Yep, the big oil companies. And do you honestly think that the big oil companies will be buying soybeans from untold thousands of small family farmers or their co-operatives? Nope, they'll buy from ADM or ConAgra or other brobdingnagian farming corporations.
So how will this play out? My prediction is that small farmers will go deeper into debt trying to meet the soybean demands of small biodiesel providers. Then California will require that all diesel be a blend of at least 20% biodiesel. Texas will quickly follow suit to avoid loss of highway funds for failing to meet clean air requirements. NY will do the same. BigOil™ will immediately jump in and take over the market and BigFarmCo™ will be their supplier. All the small farms will go bankrupt and BigFarmCo™ will buy all the family farms at auction.
Gee, thanks, Willie! With friends like you, who needs enemies?
I actually think that biodiesel makes a lot of sense and hope that it gains traction. I just think that Willie Nelson is doing small farmers a disservice by suggesting that they'll get to make more money by selling soybeans to biodiesel producers without telling them that it will be a short term windfall.
Biodiesel is a very clean burning diesel alternative (i.e. it can be used in standard diesel engines) that is made from vegetable oil or animal fats. In the US, most biodiesel is made from soybean oil, and it is that connection which attracted the Farm Aid organizer.
Today, biodiesel is still a niche fuel product, selling only about 30 million gallons in 2004 (according to the National Biodiesel Board). Indeed, it is possible to make your own biodiesel at home, in whatever quantities you wish. All you need is clean vegetable oil, lye, and alcohol, all of which can be made at home if you are so inclined.
Last year, the American Jobs Creation Act of 2004 created a tax incentive for biodiesel producers. Cities and States with pollution problems are also looking at biodiesel because of its cleanliness compared to "dino-diesel". So I wouldn't be at all surprised if states started requiring the use of biodiesel as a way to meet clean air requirements.
When (if?) that happens, who do YOU think will be producing biodiesel? Yep, the big oil companies. And do you honestly think that the big oil companies will be buying soybeans from untold thousands of small family farmers or their co-operatives? Nope, they'll buy from ADM or ConAgra or other brobdingnagian farming corporations.
So how will this play out? My prediction is that small farmers will go deeper into debt trying to meet the soybean demands of small biodiesel providers. Then California will require that all diesel be a blend of at least 20% biodiesel. Texas will quickly follow suit to avoid loss of highway funds for failing to meet clean air requirements. NY will do the same. BigOil™ will immediately jump in and take over the market and BigFarmCo™ will be their supplier. All the small farms will go bankrupt and BigFarmCo™ will buy all the family farms at auction.
Gee, thanks, Willie! With friends like you, who needs enemies?
I actually think that biodiesel makes a lot of sense and hope that it gains traction. I just think that Willie Nelson is doing small farmers a disservice by suggesting that they'll get to make more money by selling soybeans to biodiesel producers without telling them that it will be a short term windfall.
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